Monday, May 08, 2006

5/9/06 - Broccoli

Today's post is dedicated to all the children and adults with the palet of children who read this site. Like small children, I hate broccoli. I hate it dipped in cheese. I hate it with ranch. I hate it stir-fried. I hate it deep fried. It is disgusting.

Did you know that Orthodox Jews will not eat broccoli because they are afraid it will violate their dietary laws? You see, broccoli is well known to have mites living in the top and no matter how much you clean broccoli, there is no guarentee that the mites will wash out.

Did you know that broccoli can interfere with thyroid hormone synthesis? If you or anyone you know has a thyroid problem, you might suggest contacting a doctor before eating any more broccoli.

Have you ever had broccoli go bad in your kitchen? It smells horrible. The place will stink for days. Much worse than a toilet bowl full of sh*t.

What kindof people like broccoli? People like this:

Do you want to be like them? I thought not.

Broccoli is disgusting and I will never be convinced that it has enough healthy benefits to be worthy of eating. Broccoli: I hate you.

And if you have 3 mins:


Blogger Maulleigh said...

Son of a bitch! I kind of like broccoli. :( Not like in a pizza-and-ice-cream way, but in a I-can-choke-it-down-for-health-reasons way.

I guess you and I are going to have to agree to disagree on this one, hatah!

9:00 AM  
Blogger bill said...

I don't mind it so much, and I even will dip it ranch. However, if broccoli gets put in my salad I turn violent.

9:02 AM  
Blogger Daily Hater said...

I refuse to believe that anyone likes broccoli. You may have convinced yourself its healthy, but there are many risks associated with eating it. I encourage everyone to stop eating broccoli.

9:11 AM  
Blogger El Padrino said...

Sorry Hater, I like Broccoli. Genuinely. Fried is the best but sauted with garlic/oil and lemon. With al dente pasta is delicious.

Raw brocolli is the devil. Gotta be cooked. Never heard of the mites thing but hey what you don't know won't hurt you. So I'll pretend I don't know. Plus don't we swallow like 3 or four spiders a year when we sleep? Or is someone messing with me.

Dude, chicken and broccoli (Chinese Restaurant) at 5am,
after a night out....magnificent.

9:23 AM  
Blogger bowling with no panties said...

My friend's friend had a blind date with a guy who held up a little stalk of broccoli and said, "Mmm, broccoli, it's the toothbrush for the colon."

How can you hate that? That's awesome.


1:51 PM  
Blogger Daily Hater said...

sorry about the youtube clips just being white squares at the moment. appears that is down. I hope its just momentary though its only a matter of time till they lose a big law suite (ala napster)

2:05 PM  
Anonymous Julia said...

I share your hate of broccoli.

3:37 AM  

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